I don’t see the point in worrying or stressing about men and relationships, so it all just comes so easily and naturally to me. Now I am so much more relaxed about dating. I think that a lot of my control issues relating to men stemmed from bad experiences with guys in the past or fear of looking like a fool - I guess to the people around me especially my friends and family. I was so sensitive to any minor slight! It was all about control (or fear of not having any). In my book Survive, Live or Thrive?I tell the story of a guy who jokingly mentioned that I had a “little mustache” on a date so I never called him again. Never mind that he might be tied up at work or otherwise distracted. For instance, if a guy didn’t respond to my texts right away I’d write him off immediately. If the guy did one thing I didn’t like, I would just end contact immediately. I used to be so particular and structured about how my relationship or dating experience would go. The therapist told her to repeat the following line over and over: Relax, Relate, Release! Whitley was wound up over something and struggling for control. In it, the main character Whitley Gilbert (played by actress Jasmine Guy) was in a counseling session with a therapist played by actress Debbie Allen. There was a classic scene in one of my favorite television shows from the 90s called It’s a Different World.
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